Lessons in Puke.

Yes, that's right, I said Puke. That's this morning's topic. I've been dealing with it so much lately, I feel I have to talk about it, or I might just explode.

Yes, I'm pregnant. But it's not me doing all this puking. It's me cleaning up all this puke. I hear you all asking "Why is this, Catty?". Well now. Let's explore that question, shall we?

First example, and I'm sure Big Boss Man will be so pleased to see this on my blog (but he convinced me to start it anyway, so he had to understand he would be the topic of many a post, right?). A few nights ago, I awoke to sounds of gasping...wheezing, gulping, heaving...I've never been so scared in my life. It was BBM, who went from the bed to the floor in a matter of seconds, simply trying to catch his breath.

Now this has happened a couple times in the past, but never to this severity. He stops breathing at night, and then his brain wakes him all of a sudden and he wakes up trying to breathe again. This was the worst I've seen it. So I'm standing at the end of the bed, jaw dropped, waiting for him to say something like "I'm alright" or "I need help" or "get me a glass of water"...anything. What does he do? He climbs back into bed. I ask him if he needs something to drink, he says "It was just a bad dream", and he's dead asleep before I even walk back to my side of the bed.

Of course, I couldn't go back to sleep after this, so I took my stuff to the couch, watched tv for a few, then went to sleep. I wake up the next morning to puke all over our bedroom floor. Floor I'd stood on not 6 hours earlier. So I knew it had happened again, and I just didn't hear it. Lovely.

So I cleaned that up. Thank God I was very newly pregnant and didn't have any kind of symptoms at all.

Fast forward to last night, when Beanpole wakes me up around 5am to tell me that he's thrown up. I couldn't handle it. Of course, he's on the top bunk, and he didn't quite make it down before it happened, so there's puke on both beds (imagine Little Linebacker's surprise!). So I grab clean blankets and take them out into the living room, get them set up there, close the door to their bedroom, and let it be. I couldn't deal with it in general, let alone at 5am.

Probably not the brightest thing I've ever done, but it was way too early in the morning to be thinking clearly.

So after taking them to school, I resign to the idea that it must be cleaned up now, otherwise it will sit and fester all day long and I'll just have to deal with it when I get home from work today. So I got in, grab the sheets with lightening speed, run to the basement, shove them in the washer, and start the cycle. I about lost my cookies while putting them into the washer. I'm about to lose my cookies just thinking about it here. When this wash cycle is done, I'll immediately start another one, just to be sure.

The good news is Beanpole was just fine this morning...not at all feverish, and rip-roarin' to go to school. I'd almost wished he would've been sick, because then I'd have to call in (which I really can't afford to do). So while I'm at work today, I'll buy copious amounts of febreeze antimicrobial, and I'll drench the beds in it right when I get home. Then it will have time to dry before bed. Thank God for mattress covers.

So...if you've read this far without renting your garments, good for you!! Sorry to lay something this heavy on you this early in the morning (or this close to breakfast), but I had to get it off my chest.