Change of Heart

Last night I was going to write about being tired. being weary. exhaustion. I think I actually used to words "dead woman walking" when discussing it with my husband. After a week of vacation (and not really being used to back to working before then), yesterday I felt like I needed toothpicks to keep my eyes open.

Then I caught myself. I've been making an effort lately...a sincere effort, to stop complaining. to stop sweating the small stuff. to be content with the innumerable blessings I've been given.

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. ~Proverbs 17:22

Then, lo and behold, this morning I'm reading my daily email from At the Well, and something she wrote caught my eye.

"She didn't reflect the heavily-burdened spirit that one might expect from a life of self-sacrifice. Her face radiated joy."

Tiana writes of a woman, in her 80's, who has lived a full life, complete with husband, children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Here I am, in my 30's, with a husband and still young children...does my face radiate joy? Do I live truly live a life of self-sacrifice? I struggle with selfishness. I struggle with laziness. But I am trying. I am praying daily for peace. For patience. For understanding. For contentment.