:) :(

THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY:

~that the rain has turned to snow in places west of our area (winter is my favorite season)
~that God is so absolutely forgiving, even as I fail as a wife, parent, and homemaker daily
~soft and chewy chocolate chip cookies (I think I found my lost recipe...I'm trying it this weekend and will post results)
~hot coffee with peppermint mocha creamer
~falling back!! (don't forget to set your clocks back and replace smoke alarm batteries this weekend)
~roast in the crock pot (is the crock pot on my list every week?? I love my crock pot)

THINGS THAT MAKE ME SAD:

~early huge snowstorms on the East Coast. I've been praying for relief for family and friends we have there.
~matching socks (see my bible verse below: it's one I meditate on while on sock duty)


Let us not become weary of doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. ~Galatians 6:9

I believe this is an important verse for any mother, as we tread through the seemingly menial tasks of keeping home. We are serving our family by making our home a haven, a comfortable, welcoming place that exudes our love, and more importantly, that of our Heavenly Father. Our family should feel at peace when walking through the door, and we as homemakers are charged with that duty. Take comfort that this is of God's design! He is all-knowing, and He has given you everything you need to succeed in this role, including your greatest lifeline: Him!!

Trick or Treat (a day early!)

For some reason, our “village” has trick or treating two days – tonight and tomorrow night. So the older kids dressed up and went down our street and back (Gina stayed here at home, as she’d had enough candy from yesterday – more on that later). So far tonight, we’ve had one little girl who was too afraid to take the candy, another little girl who refused our candy because “I don’t like that kind”, and a dad who was screaming at his son to hurry up and get to the next house. I’m not sure I have it in me to hand out candy again tomorrow night.

We also went to the local parade, which was awesome (and incredibly long!). Lots of floats, a few marching bands (yay band geeks!!), and lots of candy tossed our way. I don’t know what it is about wee little ones, but floaters always flip and extra handful of candy towards Gina. Not that I’m complaining. My hips might be, but I’m not.

This is the time of year when many of the blogs I follow are writing about their reasoning behind not celebrating Halloween. I have to admit something: we still celebrate it, and not because I disagree with much of anything my fellow bloggers have to say about it. We celebrate it because I’m still a weak parent when it comes to things like this. Our older kids have gone trick or treating every year since they were very young, and I just couldn’t say no to them this year. And although I let them dress up, I did not allow them to stand in our yard and scare their fellow trick or treaters.

I’m also at the place where I question the harm in carving a pumpkin or attending a parade. I get that the whole holiday is very dark, and that the world has so much evil, gore, killing and senselessness already. We do not allow that much and do make them cut back this year. Perhaps next year, when I’m further in my walk with God and further into my Bible studies, I’ll be more comfortable not celebrating it at all.

I guess all I’m saying is this: please don’t judge my family because we still celebrate in a fun way on Halloween. If you think it’s wrong, that’s fine. Please remember back to when you first started your true walk with the Lord. Remember all the mistakes you made while learning. Remember all the things you wanted to figure out. Questions you had that made you want to research and study the Bible for answers. This is where I am. And the great thing about our Heavenly Father is that if what I’m doing is wrong, and I figure it out later and repent for it, He’s alright with that. He made me perfectly imperfect so I could glorify Him for the changes He’s made (and will make) in me. Glorify Him for His daily renewed grace.

Be Still

One of my favorite verses. I have a few, and since I've been following my Bible plans on my YouVersion account, my list has grown. But Psalm 46:10 is one of my favorites.

We are so busy. So rushed. So have-to-stop-at-McDonald's-again-because-we'll-never-make-it-from-soccer-practice-to-Bible-study-on-time-ful (yes, I know). So worried. So anxious. So stressed. Even our "quiet time" is often spent working our minds, solving problems or making plans. Isn't is FANTASTIC to know that He is God?

Be still and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth. ~Psalm 46:10

What's completely awesome about this is that in the midst of troubles, we know that He is there as well. We must work hard, yes. We must do everything we can to "fix" our broken lives. But we can relax and realize that when our part is done, His part is still being worked on. He is always working in our lives. And whatever happens is His will, and for His glory.

So be still, friends, and know that He is God.

:) :(

THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY:

~leaves turning
~a chilly house felt from under the warmth of a quilt
~finishing a cross stitch project
~chicken noodle soup
~a free magazine subscription from my Coke points
~God's renewing grace every. single. day.

THINGS THAT MAKE ME SAD:

~raking aforementioned leaves
~potty training

God Knew What He Was Doing (of course!)

Another year has come and gone. Eight years ago, my husband and I pledged a lifetime together to ourselves, our family and friends, and to God. We've been through so many things, good times and bad. Thankfully, that which does not kill us, makes us stronger.

I thank God for bringing Patrick into my life. for arranging those stars just perfectly. for giving us the strength to get going when the going got tough. I am so thankful and blessed. Even on my worst days, I'm the luckiest woman on Earth, being married to the man God created me for. Being his help meet has been the best job I've ever had. I'm pretty bad at it ;) but I'm still learning eagerly. There are so many people who have come into my life and shown me what it means to truly be a wife, and I'm so thankful to all of them as well. I know God's hand is in it, as it always is, and I'm grateful He has opened my eyes to see, my ears to listen, my mind to learn, and my heart to love.

Here's to a lifetime full of love.

Lord, Help Me

That's just about all I have to say about today. And that I'm SO thankful His mercies are new each day. If I get to wake another morning, I will use that day to live the life of His faithful servant, and to not be afraid, downtrodden, or weary.

:) :(

THINGS THAT MAKE ME HAPPY:

~getting our car fixed, by my brother (brilliant with cars), with a used (but guaranteed!) part (yay cheap!!)
~that in T minus 75 minutes, I'll be TGIFing with the best of 'em
~a retirement party on Sunday of a pharmacist from my old store, the guy who really got the wheels turning concerning being a tech
~coming home to the sounds of "MOMMY!!!" through the open windows
~perfect timing (more specifically, His perfect timing)

THINGS THAT MAKE ME SAD:

~losing things




An Apology

Yesterday was a really rough day at work. I was very down last night because of it. After writing yesterday's post, I felt absolutely lifted in prayer (and thank you for so many kind and encouraging emails!!). Today was still tough. I'm struggling at work, not necessarily fitting in, but keeping up. Tonight, I read an email from Proverbs 31 Devotions:

"In other words, seeking to obey God in the midst of whatever circumstance I’m facing will position me to work in the flow of God’s power. I’ll still have to navigate the realities of my situation but I won’t be doing it with my strength."

WHOAH.

Does God know EXACTLY what I need to hear, and when I need to hear it??? Why am I fighting His power?

Lord, forgive me for being stubborn, and continually trying to fight against Your plan for me. Open my heart to Your perfect will, which I may not understand. Thank you, Heavenly Father, for the blessings you've given me, even though I may not recognize them as blessings right away. Thank you for every single chance you give me to glorify your name and to speak of your grace and mercy. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Bread, Books, and Baseball

After a long day at work, I'm finally sitting on the couch, watching the St. Louis Cardinals play the New York Muts. I enjoy baseball, but more for the cold beer, jalapeño-topped nachos, and mustard-drenched hot dogs, all of which taste a thousand times better at the ballpark. The last baseball game I went to was shortly after Thomas (now 12) was born. Sadly, it's been awhile.

I had to stop by Wal-Mart on my way home because I was completely out of contact solution, and Thomas needed more self-sticking tape for his splint. Ours is a Super Wal-Mart, so of course I had to go to the bakery section. I got some Italian-topped bread, which I'm munching on now. I'm not sure what they put on this bread, but it's pretty good. I'd still prefer to make my own, but for store bought, it's not bad.

My before bed reading is At Home In Mitford, the first of the Mitford Years. I've read the entire series several times, and I can still read it again. The books are wonderful, and Mitford sounds like such a lovely town. Sometimes I completely lose myself in the books, in the characters and their stories. It is also where I read "Philippians 4:13, for Pete's sake!!". I think everyone, whether close to God or not, has heard this verse sometime in their life.

I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength. ~Philippians 4:13

I know I've heard it. Hearing and believing are two totally different animals. For some reason though, reading it over and over in this series brought it to the forefront in my brain and in my heart, and it finally started to sink in. God's power is awe-inspiring, isn't it?? His miracles are ever-coming.


P.S. The Cardinals won the game!

Change of Heart

Last night I was going to write about being tired. being weary. exhaustion. I think I actually used to words "dead woman walking" when discussing it with my husband. After a week of vacation (and not really being used to back to working before then), yesterday I felt like I needed toothpicks to keep my eyes open.

Then I caught myself. I've been making an effort lately...a sincere effort, to stop complaining. to stop sweating the small stuff. to be content with the innumerable blessings I've been given.

A cheerful heart is good medicine, but a crushed spirit dries up the bones. ~Proverbs 17:22

Then, lo and behold, this morning I'm reading my daily email from At the Well, and something she wrote caught my eye.

"She didn't reflect the heavily-burdened spirit that one might expect from a life of self-sacrifice. Her face radiated joy."

Tiana writes of a woman, in her 80's, who has lived a full life, complete with husband, children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Here I am, in my 30's, with a husband and still young children...does my face radiate joy? Do I live truly live a life of self-sacrifice? I struggle with selfishness. I struggle with laziness. But I am trying. I am praying daily for peace. For patience. For understanding. For contentment.

Never Ending

This past Friday, my older son jammed his right thumb playing football at his afterschool program. Some ice and an ibuprofen later, he was fine and back to his jovial pre-teen self for the weekend.

Fast forward to Tuesday.

He comes home again, jammed left pinky. Same swelling, same pain, same ability to bend (except for the limitations caused by a finger 3 times its normal size). So, same treatment. Except the swelling wouldn't go down, and the bruising was much more extensive.

Emergency room, here we come. Better safe than sorry, right? And it turns out, we probably should've taken him the first night it happened. He's got a small fracture in his hand, which isn't causing him much pain unless he bumps it or moves it. Thank God for that. And now he's unable to move it at all thanks to the splint they put on in the ER. Now we have an appointment with his pediatrician on Monday, who should refer him to an orthopedic doctor (the one the ER referred him to doesn't take our insurance. Go figure). I felt awful for not taking him that first night, but thankfully, I asked him to forgive me, which he did.

Our Heavenly Father does the same.

"I am so thankful His mercies are new every morning." ~Lamentations 3:22-23

Do you know how many times I've screwed up as a mommy? as a wife? as a friend? as a Christian? Do you know how many times I've needed His mercies?? Every single time, every single day, every single hour (and sadly, sometimes minute), He is there, offering me another chance, complete with all the love a child could ask for. Our God is an awesome God.

.

Seven Years

Sevens are lucky for many. Casinos are filled with them, as are lottery tickets. Who would think, then, that our seventh year of marriage would be the hardest we've been through yet?



I won't list everything my husband and I have been through in the past year. It's not glamorous, exciting, or interesting in the least. The point is, we made it through that seventh year...to today.

Our seventh wedding anniversary.



The seventh anniversary of the day I married the man God put on this Earth for me to find. Of the day when I gave my heart and soul to him "officially", although I knew long before then that he was The One. Of the day when we vowed to each other that nothing would come between us.

Well, the proof is in the pudding, people. The past year has been full of trials and hardships. And today we celebrate every single one of those days as a triumph of our love for one another. A love that held fast against outside forces. A love that is greater than it's ever been because we made it through all of them. We may have done things a little backwards in our relationship, but that's okay. It makes us unique. It makes us that much stronger.

Here's to a lifetime more of memories, trials, celebrations and anniversaries.



Thank you for putting up with me for this long. I love you!

Lost heart.

Last night, my boys were watching a skateboarding competition that they'd recorded earlier. The kids were pretty good (all guys, which sort of disappointed me...I'd love to see a girl go out there and place right along with them). The prize money was outrageous, in my opinion. Anyway...

It wasn't over when bedtime crept up, so I had them stop it where it was, with the promise that they could finish watching tonight. Off to bed they went! This morning, I turned the tv on to have some noise while I emptied the dishwasher (a BAD habit, but a habit nonetheless), and it was turned to some station I'd never heard of before. There was a woman speaking (of course I can't remember her name). I was listening halfheartedly as I did the dishes, but I heard her read a Psalm which caught my ear. I didn't hear which Psalm it was specifically, so I googled it, and found it.

I would have lost heart, unless I had believed that I would see the goodness of the LORD in the land of the living. Psalm 27:13

And I can't explain to you how absolutely necessary that verse was for me today. Or in the past few days. Or the past few weeks. Really, even months. This show was on a station I'd never seen before, a show I'd never heard of, and the kind of evangelic-looking show that I would normally tune off, simply because I don't get into that sort of preaching. Normally. But I kept it on. This woman had the audience laughing, and she was dressed like I would be dressed up on a stage in front of hundreds of people, and she was talking like I would've talked up on a stage in front of hundreds of people. So I kept her on. And I heard that verse. And God spoke to me.

Hard times are just that - HARD. But like that woman said this morning - you've got to get in the habit of replying with one simple phrase when something bad comes your way and knocks you upside the head:

I can handle it.

Because guess what? You can. Our God won't ever give us anything we can't handle without His guidance. Without His help. Without His loving kindness. Without His forgiveness. Without His grace. And He gives us all that and more, over and over, every single minute of every single day. Isn't that inspiring? Doesn't that make you feel as though you could climb the tallest mountain?

My God does not set out to make me miserable. He wants me to call on Him, and to keep my heart open to all He has to give. I know I will see His goodness in this life.

Deep breaths.

Do you ever have those days where you have to force yourself to count to 10 about, I don't know, 15 bazillion times? Where you've taken so many deep breaths that you start to feel dizzy? That even your last nerve is about to break? How do you handle these moments? Do you block everything out? Do you have a hobby to take your mind off things? Do you meditate? Pray? Lose yourself in a good book?

I had one of those days yesterday. In fact, I started this post last evening, but ended up getting up from the desk to do some other stuff, and never returned. I'm not going to exaggerate and say that *everything* was going wrong, but goodness...it sure seemed like it. After I finished up a chapter in the new book I found at the library last night, I prayed that God would wake me up on the right side of the bed this morning and help me to see the simple blessings that I might experience today with fresh eyes. (And yes, I may have thrown in a request to let my new attitude affect that of my children...maybe).

I know that one of God's purposes for me is to raise my children to seek Him, and to be a comfort and blessing to my husband. Sometimes we all slip up, and must get back to basics - He wouldn't have called us for such a demanding job if He didn't think we were up to it! Philippians 4:13 (one of my favorite verses) reminds us that we can do anything through Christ and His strength. What an awesome promise! Sometimes when I'm feeling the burn, so to speak, I tell myself that over and over (in my favorite Jan Karon way) "Philippians 4:13, for Pete's sake!!". I have to remind myself that anytime I feel weak and unable to perform the tasks at hand, Jesus has my back - that's his guarantee. That doesn't mean it's going to be pleasant, but I'll make it through just the same, leaning on Him.

Must. Get. Digital. Camera.

Tonight I had to run out for an errand, and by the time I came back into my neighborhood, the sun (gasp!) was nearing the horizon. As I drove along, I'm sure God was with me. The sun, which hasn't been seen in these parts in eons, it seems, was low enough that I couldn't see it through the houses and trees, but just high enough that it hit the tops of trees, setting the fall colors ablaze. As pulled into my driveway and quickly got my husband, but the sun had lowered too far, too fast before we made it back out to look.

God's reminders of His grace are all around us. I only wish I'd had a working camera to catch this and share it with you through pictures as well as words.